Show Archive‎ > ‎2011‎ > ‎Video sketches‎ > ‎

PokeRap

Very soft track of the original PokeRap.
TITLE: For the last fifteen years, Nintendo has been unnecessarily updating the Pokemon franchise.
Music continues to build in intensity.
TITLE: But one piece of Pokemon History remains untouched - the PokeRap.
Pump music @ maximum volume.
TITLE: And now, we're updating it.
Music cut.
Fade to black
Empire State of Mind backing track plays.


[ASH]

Yeah

Yeah I'm out from Pallet

Now I'm searching far and wide

Teachin all my pokemon

To find the power that's inside


Oak gave me a pokedex

Started with five pokeballs

Gary said I couldn't do it

Guess what bitch? I caught 'em all


Need the full one-fifty

Darkest caves contain the rares

can't find a Clefairy

Zubats fucking everywhere


Take 'em from my Pokebox

Trade 'em with a Pokefan

and just like magic Abra Kadabra Alakazam


Threw all my safari balls

At a Tauros stampede

Remember forcefeedin' Nidorans with Rare Candies


Giovanni is the boss

Team Rocket thievin'

Runnin crime syndicates and gyms in Viridian


I beat the Elite Four

Crushed all of Gary's dreams

Hall of fame for my team

Drop dragonite with ice beam


Buddy, I'm the champ now

Pikachu next to me

Fly like a Pidgeot and I most definitely play


[MISTY]

Po-ke-mon

Gotta be the one to catch them all

From Mankey to Mewtwo

Raisin' po-ke-mon

Doesn't matter if you're red or blue

Just shout out "I choose you!"

Train them til they evolve, evolve, evolve

(you're welcome charmander. I made you a dragon!)


[ASH]

I've gone from stowaway to captain of the SS Anne

Shit, my star is rising faster than a punch from Hitmonchan

You should know I play Blue, but I ain't a Lapras

But I got a squad of squirtles acting pretty bad-ass


[BROCK]

Surfin out to cinnibar

Searchin for a missingno

Limitless rare candies

Diglett dig my new dugtrio

Youngster fight, comfy shorts, rattata, quick attack

Double-team, attack missed, One-hit KO, marowak


[ASH]

8 million trainers out there tryin to make it

Past Saffron City most of them can't take it

Me I played the flute, moved Snorlax out my way,

Defeated Lieutenant Surge, Erika, Sabrina, Blaine

Articuno

Moltres, Zapdos

Rarer than the fossil of the last Kabutops

Scope out a Gastly, got my pokedex made

Caught me a Kingler

It's my destiny to train


[MISTY]

Po-ke-mon

Rockets tell you prepare for trouble

and then make it double

Protect your po-ke-mon

When James and Jesse attack you

Thunderbolt from Pikachu

Team Rocket will blast off, blast off, blast off

(Agaaaaaaaaaaaaain)


[BROCK]
Surfing waves on the dopest Gyarados you'll see,
Every Pokemon he owns knows Hyper Beam,

 

[MISTY]

Ain't no trainer in the region can compare,
Ash caught em all and heads the elite four, yeaaahh
come on, come,
yeah,

[ALL]

Po-ke-mon

Complete pokedex is not the end

When they are your best friends

How great are Po-ke-mon

Please don't introduce any more new,

Just one-fifty plus Mew

Let's hear it for Po-ke, mon-Po, Ke-mon


[End]




BLACK


TEXT:

POKEMON:

Fuck da Polliwag


(Image of a polliwag with a police badge)

ORIGINAL LYRICS: "Empire State of Mind" (Jay-Z, Alicia Keys)

[JAY-Z]
Yeah
Yeah I'm out that Brooklyn
Now I'm down in TriBeCa
Right next to Deniro
But I'll be hood forever

I'm the new Sinatra,
And since I made it here
I can make it anywhere
Yeah, they love me everywhere

I used to cop in Harlem,
All of my Dominicano's
Right there up on Broadway
Pull me back to that McDonald's

Took it to my stashbox,
560 State St.
catch me in the kitchen like a Simmons with them Pastry's

Cruisin' down 8th St.,
off white Lexus
drivin' so slow,
but BK is from Texas

Me, I'm out that Bed-Stuy,
home of that boy Biggie
now I live on Billboard
and I brought my boys with me

Say what's up to Ty-Ty,
still sippin' mai tai's
sittin' courtside,
Knicks & Nets give me high five

Nigga I be Spike'd out,
I could trip a referee
Tell by my attitude that I'm most definitely from....

[Chorus: Alicia Keys]
New York,
Concrete jungle where dreams are made, oh
There's nothin' you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York, New York


[Verse 2: Jay-Z]
Catch me at the X with OG at a Yankee game
Shit, I made the Yankee hat more famous then a Yankee can
You should know I bleed blue, but I ain't a Crip though
but I got a gang of niggas walkin' with my clique though




Welcome to the melting pot,
corners where we sellin' rock
Afrika Bambataa shit,
home of the hip-hop
Yellow cab, gypsy cab, dollar cab, holla back
for foreigners it ain't for, they act like they forgot how to act


8 million stories, out there in it naked
City, it's a pity, half of y'all won't make it
Me, I got a plug, Special Ed "I Got It Made"
If Jeezy's payin' LeBron, I'm payin' Dwyane Wade
Three dice cee-lo,
three Card Monty
Labor Day Parade, rest in peace Bob Marley
Statue of Liberty, long live the World Trade
Long live the King yo,
I'm from the Empire State that's

[Chorus:]
New York,
Concrete jungle where dreams are made, oh
There's nothing you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York, New York

[Bridge: Alicia Keys]

One hand in the air for the big city
Street lights, big dreams, all lookin' pretty


No place in the world that could compare
Put your lighters in the air, everybody say yeah
come on
yeah

[Chorus:] 
New York, 
Concrete jungle where dreams are made, oh
There's nothing you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York, New York
Comments