SUPERMAN AND SUPERMUM <Normal Lighting> (Young SUPERMAN runs into the room and heads for the front door. His MOTHER enters) MOTHER: No running indoors! SUPERMAN: Sorry Mum I am aware of the no running indoors policy, it's just that Lex Luther's kidnapped a bus full of school-children! MOTHER: Still that's no reason to be running indoors... SUPERMAN: Well actually, yes it is, it's the best reason to be running indoors. I'm going downtown to save them. MOTHER: What? Now? No way, Mister. It's too late at night, you could get shot! SUPERMAN: No I couldn't. I literally couldn't. I'm faster than a speeding bullet. MOTHER: Not in here you aren't. In our house you have to obey our rules. Where are your glasses? SUPERMAN: Mum, I have 20-20.. I have x-ray vision. MOTHER: Well you think with x-ray vision he'd be able to find his glasses! Have you packed a helmet? SUPERMAN: Why would I need a... MOTHER: If you're flying you're wearing a helmet. You don't see me flying about without a helmet. SUPERMAN: I don't see you flying about. MOTHER: And why aren't you wearing your cape? It's cold outside! SUPERMAN: I think I'll be fine. SUPERMAN: No, Mum! I don't want brisket! I want to go and save the lives of that bus load of children! MOTHER: Typical teenage boy, thinks he's Batman. SUPERMAN: What?? MOTHER: Don't you raise your voice at me, Clarky! SUPERMAN: Don't call me Clarky! MOTHER: I'll call my son anything I want. SUPERMAN: YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY REAL MUM! MOTHER: [gasps] Clark Joseph Kent, you're grounded. SUPERMAN: How are you possibly going to ground me? I'M SUPER....... <Green lighting> MOTHER: [pulls out Kryptonite] [puts rock on chest] SUPERMAN: [collapses] <IF ENOUGH LAUGHTER, lights down here> MOTHER: Now I'll go get that Brisket. <Lights down> |
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