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Shuttle-launch voice-over intro

SPEAKER: Science Revue to mission control. NASAblanca is almost ready for take off. We would just like to remind all our astronauts of a few last minute procedures before blasting off into the stratosphere.

Our state of the art shuttle equipment is highly sensitive, so please turn off your mobile phones to avoid interference.

Our space program director has also asked me to remind you that during take off and throughout the flight there will be fstrobe lights and smoke. If you're epileptic or asthmatic - well, maybe you shouldn't have become an astronaut!

As our space-shuttle is highly pressurised with space-oxygen - the most flammable kind of oxygen - smoking is punishable by explosion. The space-flight is scheduled to take two and a half space-hours. There will be a short interval halfway through the space-trip for using space-toilets. The most futuristic of all toilets.

In the event of a meteor shower, supernova, or regular nova the exit doors are located at the rear of the space theatre.

Ladies and gentlemen, the cabin is flooding with laughing gas, Zip up your spacesuits and secure the space doors. Prepare for launch. The 2011 Science Revue will be launching in 10, 9, giggle valves open, 6 5 [band ignition] 3 2 1 Lift off! We have lift off!