MARY: Hey Greg. GARY: We’re going to have sex together! MARY: Excuse me? GARY: I had a premonition last night that we’re going to have sex. I even have the evidence right here. (Drops a pair of pants on the floor with a wet patch on them) That’s the power of premonitions right there. MARY: Greg. What you had was a wet dream! GARY: Wet, (points to pants) yes! Dream? I think not! For you see, I don’t dream Mary. For all my dreams come true! MARY: Name one dream that’s come true. GARY: Once I had a dream about going to school. Another time I had a dream where I waited in line. MARY: You had a dream about waiting in line? GARY: Yeah! And then it came true! MARY: They’re both very average things. Is there any dreams you’ve had that are unusual that have actually come true? GARY: One time I had a dream about falling! And just the next day it happened! I went sky diving! Actually, I went sky diving, and then I had a dream about falling. And then I went sky diving again! MARY: It just seems like you fulfilled your own prophecy there. GARY: One time I had a dream that I was naked in front of a large crowd of people. MARY: Did that happen? GARY: No. But I’ll make it happen. MARY: It just seems like your having very average dreams and fulfilling your own prophecies. GARY: One time a had a dream that aliens from the planet Narklon’na’tok visited me and granted me the power to make paint dry faster. MARY: That’s a very mild power. GARY: How long ago did you paint your nails Mary? MARY: About 5 minutes ago. GARY: Check them. MARY: They’re dry. But I mean, they could have just dried - GARY: One time I had a dream that your middle name is Anne. MARY: Well it is. GARY: One time I had a dream that your mother works on a jam farm. MARY: How did you know that? GARY: One time I had a dream that your dog was run over. MARY: My dog? GARY: Well I ran over your dog, but it was by accident. MARY: Oh god! GARY: And just last week I had a dream that a man would throw a priceless vase onto the ground, in three, two, one. Juliets+sugar glass. GARY: And last night I had a dream we’ll have sex together. And so it’s definitely going to happen! MARY: And this is inevitable? GARY: Yes. Clown enters. GARY: Right on schedule. |
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