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Rise of the Skeletons

[A Jack + Ben work]

NEWSFLASH

Reporter: Hello. This is a news flash. The skeletons have come alive and are taking over the world and destroying the humans. The only trouble is, they're still inside the humans.

Reporter punches self in face continually

Reporter: Ahh! Somebody help!

A man with a gun enters

Reporter: Quick! Shoot the skeleton!
Man: But it's using you as cover!

Man starts shooting at his own feet - dancing to avoid the shots

Man: What do we do now?
Reporter: Wait! (Starts writing on the table) It's issuing demands - We want .. voting rights! land rights! calcium! Or else you will all die.
Man: We'll have to give it to them! I'd be useless without my bones.
Reporter: There's 216 bones in the human body! We're horribly outnumbered! They'll take over the world! We can't let them win!
Man: You're right. We must never drink milk again.
(beat)
Both hit themselves again
Reporter: Okay - okay .. we give in

(Punchline which should not be used because I wrote it and it's horrid shit)
Man: It's no use - we're spineless without them.
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