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Guitar Hero and Piano Man

(Note. This was written while high on fairy bread and requires some SERIOUS limb hacking to get to the good stuff)

The conductor (C) is on the stage right Juliet they attempt to start the band playing. The band are unable to play, they look confused, shaking their instruments and such.

C: Hang on! Something is wrong with the music. This looks like a job for GUITAR HERO!!!

lights up on stage left Juliet reveling guitar hero (GH) and roadie (R)

C: Guitar Hero! We need your help! Something is stopping the music!
GH: How so?
C: Someone has stolen A minor!
GH: What do you think Roadie?
R: There is only one man sufficiently evil to contemplate this
GH: My nemesis...
R&GH: Piano Man!

lights up on main stage reveling Piano Man (PM) and his sidekick Pageturner (PT) (who only communicates by turning pages in a giant book) two Keyboard minions are holding a keyboard for piano man to play. To one side are three singers representing A minor with t-shirts with "A" "C" and "E" on them.

PM plays "DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNN" on the piano.

lights down on the juilets

PM: Away Keyboard minions! Now, Pageturner, how is our little guest?
PT: *shows arrow pointing at Aminor*
A minor: A: AAAAA C: miiiiiiii E:nerrrrrrrr (singing in the Aminor chord)
PM: ha ha! Now that I own you only I can use that chord! The most fundamental chord in all music! There will be no more gregorian chanting, pop music and especially NO MORE JAZZ!!!
*glares at Jarred F. Baker*

JFB: *plays sad little sax tune*

PM: Except of course, any I choose to play, and I only ever play my THEME SONg!

*plays piano man in a minor evil sounding key*

PT shows *applause* on page

Guitar Hero and Roadie sneak onstage but only Pageturner notices.
The pages show in sequence:
'Errrrr boss'
'Boss!!!'
'excuse me!'
'he's here!!!'
'GUITAR HERO'

PT jumps up and down etc to try and get PM's attention.

GH: Stop right there piano man!
R: (to Aminor) Don't fret! Guitar Hero is here!
GH uses little plastic guitar to 'play' a solo as an attempted weapon
PM: HA! Do you really think your pathetic plastic button pushing can stop me? I can play CHORDS!!
*plays ominous chords*
PM: Now watch Guitar Hero as I use REAL music to control you and everyone you care about!
*plays haunting music*
R: NOOOO!!!! Quick Guitar Hero! Summon your groupies!
GH: Groupies! FANGIRL ATTACK!!!

Stampeding screaming groupies run onstage and carry off piano man

Pageturner: *OH SHIT* runs off
Roadie chases away keyboard minions
GH: Here Aminor, now you are free to add colour to pop music everywhere!
Aminor: (as a chord) Thank-youuuuuuuu
GH: Come roadie! Let us continue our effort to bring music down to the lowest common denominator
exit
VO/Conductor: And thanks to the work of guitar hero we can now present to you the 2010 science revue band. *beat* featuring A minor
*band plays Aminor*

BAND NUMBER :)
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