3rd sketch final

(HARRY standing on stage alone. Enter GENERAL)

GENERAL: Your Majesty

HARRY: ah...hmmm

GENERAL: (Sarcastic) Heil Harry

HARRY: Lee, wonderful. Were you successful in procuring the Arc for me?

GENERAL: Indeed Your Majesty. Although I lost 3 good men doing it

HARRY: Three, eh?

GENERAL: Yeah and I'll probably never find them again, Paris is a big place you know.

HARRY: Oh, I know. There was this absolutely awesome costume party... Look, that's not really important now is it?

GENERAL: Indeed. How is Operation... (A sudden loud dramatic music sting. It’s Curious’s ring tone.) Oh sorry, may I take this your Highness. (Harry nods) (Answers) General Lee speaking. What, bad news? How bad? Oh, you serious? You’re fired! (Hangs up) that was my wife.

 

HARRY: What’s up?

 

CURIOUS: Well, apparently they’ve got a man on our trail. Something about ‘noticing that the Arc de Triomphe is missing’, or something like that. Anyway, as I was saying, how is Operation Operation going?


HARRY: On schedule. That bloody professor is just down in the lab finishing off the calculations.

GENERAL: Why did we get this guy, he's so annoying.

HARRY: Oh I know, do you think it's the moustache?

GENERAL: No, I don't think it's that. Do you think it might be the limp?

HARRY: No, maybe it's the bowtie

GENERAL: Maybe it's the jar with the brain he carries everwhere?

HARRY: Or the ferret?

GENERAL: Or the odd pants?

HARRY: Look that's not really important now is it? He's good at what he does. Professor get in here!

(Enter PROFESSOR, holding the instructions, Dressed as described, change previous lines to fit costume)

PROF: Your Magesty (Bows low)

HARRY: (Dismissive) Yes, yes.  Have you finished the calculations?

PROF: Well as you know the unique material the Arc de Triomphe is made from makes it perfect for this use, but also makes the calculations particularly difficult.

GENERAL: But are they finished?

PROF: Yes, yes... (Holding up instructions) If you follow these instructions...

HARRY: Those instructions right there?

PROF: Yes, these ones. If you follow these instructions exactly you will be able to shrink the Arc to the correct size to replace the missing part of Stonehenge...

HARRY: And reactivate my weapon. Give them to me.

PROF: (Hesitantly) And once I give you these you'll restore my subscription to Mad Scientist Today

HARRY: Of, course (pulls out a magazine. Exchanges knowing look with GENERAL)

(PROFESSOR hands the instructions to HARRY, But HARRY Pulls magazine at last minute)

HARRY: And there is nothing else I need to know to finish the plan.

PROF: (Desperate) No, nothing at all. All the information is  right there

(HARRY hands the magazine to PROFESSOR)

PROF: I can die a happy man.

HARRY: Well that is convenient.

(HARRY nods to GENERAL who then pulls out a gun and shoots PROFESSOR.)

HARRY: Excellent, see that everything is taken care of

(HARRY hands the instructions to GENERAL. GENERAL starts to walk away but stops)

GENERAL: No disrespect your Majesty, but how does reactivating the weapon at Stonehenge help you take over the world? There was reason it was taken out of commission in the first place.

HARRY: Don't you see, with that kind of power, I can hold world hostage. First I'll take the throne, removing my bothersome family, and then spread the English Empire worldwide. All will bow before my will, King Harry, first King of the whole world, and his right hand man... Ah hmm (GENERAL moves to HARRY's right) his right hand man, General Lee Curious

(Lead into Medley, which ends with the lights up at the side of the stage of INDIANA and MIAM first watching the song and then being captured by guards at the finale just before break for intermission)

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