2012‎ > ‎Scripts‎ > ‎

Tortured Sandwich Artist

(Boss and customer in a Subway)

Customer: Eugh! This sub is disgusting! I demand a refund.

Boss: What did you order?

Customer: Nothing that's in this sandwich!

Boss: Just a moment. (Calls to other employee) Vincent! Explain this sandwich.

Vincent: (Sighs) The bread is crusty and dry to symbolise the harshness of life. The pickle juice represents the way it gets worse the longer it goes on, just like how that sandwich will get soggier the longer you leave it. The caramelised lemon represents the disappointment of experiences you expect to be nice but turn out sour. The two chocolate buttons are the few moments of joy in an otherwise bleak existence.

Boss: You put a severed human ear in their sandwich!

Vincent: ART IS PAIN.