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Sam and Frodo

Sam: Frodo, Mr Frodo, no!

Frodo: I have to leave Sam.

Sam: Mr Frodo, don’t leave! Don’t leave Mr Frodo!

Frodo: I’m going to Mordor alone.

Sam: No you’re not!

Frodo: This is a journey I have to make on my own.

Sam: But you can’t go by yourself! It’s dangerous!

Frodo: Sam, I’m leaving. I’m going to Mordor alone.

Sam: But why? Why Mr Frodo?

Frodo: It’s the ring.

Sam: But you can’t handle it alone! You’re growing weaker every day and won’t even make it to Mordor without help! I want to help you Mr Frodo!

Frodo: I guess I’ll have to manage.

Sam: But Gandalf said I had to be here with you, for when the forces become too strong…

Frodo: I think I actually remember Gandalf saying something about you being more help back with Gimli, fighting the Orcs. Very important job, that. You could be a hero.

Sam: He never said that!

Frodo: Oh, he did. It was right when he was hanging from that ledge in Moria. Sounded a lot like “Fly, you fools”, but if you actually listened quite carefully, it was actually “Sam should definitely not go with Frodo”.

Sam: Frodo? Frodo, why are you doing this? It’s the ring, isn’t it? I’ve seen what it’s been doing to you Mr Frodo. Seen the way you talk in your sleep, call it your “precious”. It’s just not right!

Frodo: And I think someone else might have been talking in their sleep…

Sam: What?

Frodo: Saying other things that are definitely not right…

Sam: I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about Mr Frodo…

Frodo: Look, Sam. I’m really not comfortable going on with this quest if you think this relationship goes a little further than “Fellowship”.

Sam: It’s the ring! It’s made you sick! Well, I may not be able to carry the ring, but I can carry you, Mr Frodo!

*tries to lift Frodo*

Frodo: Okay, now this is exactly what I was talking about. I’m going to Mordor alone.

Sam: It’s not my fault! You’re just so weak… and gaunt… and tortured… The way that ring consumes you… It’s so… attractive…

Frodo: Goodbye Sam.

Sam: Don’t leave me, Frodo!

Frodo: Too late.

Sam: Frodo! Frodo! *cries* I’ll never find another like him… *still sobbing*

Gollum: Nasty little hobbitses… takes the precious… nasty taters…

Sam: *looks up* Who’s that?

Gollum: Where’s the precious?

Sam: He’s right here! *tries to make out with Gollum*.