DEATH STAR IR The death star. CHARLES is sitting in chair. VADER and EMPEROR enter the room. VADE: So he said "don't try to frighten us with your sorcerous ways Lord Vader" and then I force choked him. EMPE: That's why I invited you here. VADE: Master? EMPE: I've called in the union representative to discuss your work relations issues. CHARLES rises
VADE: I don't understand. EMPE: Improving this battle station’s conflict resolution may save the empire hundreds of thousands of credits in compensation. We could build a second death star with that.
VADE: Yes, Luke Skywalker wouldn't join the dark side. EMPE: And how would you recommend settling that, Charles? CHAR: Personally, I would have organised mediation in accordance with Section C of the workplace relations guide. VADE: I did that. EMPE: No, Vader. Tell him what you really did. VADE: I froze his friend in carbonite and cut off his hand. CHAR: You what? VADE: I cut off his hand. CHAR: You cut off his hand?
VADE: And his hand will grow back. Everyone wins. EMPE: Hands don't grow back, Vader. VADE: Mine did. EMPE: No. We built you a new one. VADE: Boba Fett, Bubba Fett, same thing. CHAR: We need to break this cycle of behaviour. How can we do that, Vader? VADE: I could bring the workers in one by one, and destroy their home planets. EMPE: No, you're confusing conflict resolution with genocide again.
CHAR: An improvement!
VADER force chokes CHARLES, VADER and EMPEROR force pull coffee cups and exit EMPE: Don't think I've forgotten about that exhaust shaft thing! VADE: Don't think that I've forgotten about Padme.
Lights down |