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Raw Ideas

Hi everyone! This is where your half-formed ideas go. Ideas like, "we should have a sketch where Indiana Jones takes an actual lecture," or "What if Old Spice man had depression?". 

If you'd like to look through last year's Raw Ideas list, feel free!

Keep browsing through these every now and then. If someone's had a cool idea, go and turn it into a sketch! Then put it up here :D

Funny Lines:
  • First jetpack flight coincides with first third degree burns case. To quote the pilot: "Worth it."
  • The final words of Jimmy Stegosaurus; "Ohh look Daddy a shooting star!" 
  • Google eventually takes over Earth, and decides to rename it...... Google Earth! Wait..no..they've already....They decide to name it New Planet(1).

Voice-Over-Worthy Puns:
  • On the potato famine: When life hands you potatoes, make vodka!
  • 1: What do you think you can offer Tightlips Industries Johnny? 2: I aint saying nothing. 1: Welcome aboard!
  • 1: What do you think you can offer the Titanic Mr Iceberg? 2: A TRIP YOU'LL NEVER FORGET! 1: Welcome aboard!
  • 1: What do you think you can offer Vague Industries Mr Robert? 2: A little bit of this, a little bit of that. 1: Mmm, we may think about hiring you.
  • 1: Did you hear the Pope commissioned a near light-speed spaceship? 2: Yeah, he's trying to gather mass
  • 1:Houston: She had a problem
  • (idea) voice overs could be animated in short clips!
  • "The newest album from one of hip-hop's finest. Watch him drop it incredibly old school: Jurassic! The latest from the VelociRAPtor"
  • His last words before being hung, "It's the suspense that's killing me".

Sketch Ideas:
  • An interviewer with a professional assassin 1:how did you get into this business? 2: I used to be an undertaker before the GFC and I sort of kept myself going ever since.
  • Playing tips/tag with Death.
  • Kids show/safety message - villans. e.g. Darth Vader, Voldemort, the eye of Sauron (I just really want to see someone dressed up as this), Wicked Witch of the West, Ursula (Little Mermaid) - "I used to kill for fun, but then I learnt about how it makes others feel" etc.
  • Kids show with villans - Vader in a tutu
  • Darth Vader and Luke (& Leia?) on Maury Povich/Jerry Springer - "The paternity tests have come back.... Darth, you are not the father!", "Luke, I am not your father" - Turns out to be Obi Wan
  • Draco Malfoy on World's Strictest Parents
  • Please Marry My Boy - Pinocchio - e.g. "He's a real boy!", "His nose isn't the only thing that's long - so is the time he's willing to commit!"
  • Human dominoes (perhaps better as video sketch) - someone knocks them over, person who lined them up runs out yelling "NOOOOOO!"
  • Someone who speaks only in in-jokes. Spends much of the sketch saying normal things then pissing themselves laughing. Other person not amused - while person 1 is laughing, person 2 is walking around picking up props, clearly figuring out how effectively they'd kill person 1. Eventually hits person 1 over the head with a chair or some such.
  • Trying to get a very dangerous species like the aliens from Aliens listed as endangered.
  • Trying to get a very common animal, like ants, listed as endangered, because they're so fragile.
  • Someone notices the moon for the first time
  • Superheroes start charging for their services
  • Someone has a job interview to become a job interviewer. Halfway through the interviewee becomes the interviewer - "What qualifications do you have? Let me answer your question with another question. What qualifications do YOU have?"
  • A euthanasia panel with a politician, doctor, and Jack the Ripper. Absurdity!
  • Hades isn't the god of evil. He's the god of the underworld. Why is he always portrayed as evil?
  • Alternatively, Hades bitching about ruling the gloomy underworld - "I'm the oldest, etc." - while Zeus and Poseidon get the air and sea respectively
  • Film Noir Addicts Anonymous
  • Someone puts a sheet over their head and pretends to be a ghost to avoid breaking up with their partner. Holy shit I (Adam) want this sketch written so bad.
  • A magic show where someone clearly has no suspension of disbelief. Sold on the line, "If you're so magical, why are people dying in Africa?
  • Something based on the concept "everyone knows cute animals have more feelings"
  • The scientists from Mythbusters try a really easy experiment, like trying to get water to boil, and fail to make it work. They can only get really difficult or dangerous experiments to work.
  • Something about scientific uncertainty, either as a sketch or a voiceover ("Uncertainty--its existence is still only a theory.")
  • Self proclaimed optimist misunderstands what an optimist is. "Call me an optimist, but I don't think that's going to work."
  • Motivational speaker who tells increasingly more motivating things "'Success!' It's a four-letter word!"
  • People blaming increasingly amazing feats on drugs. "This one time, I was in Peru and I kissed a llama. God I was so stoned!" "This one time I free-fell from 10,000 ft breaking the human speed record. Man I was on so much acid."
  • A defence asking the judge for increasingly ridiculous requests (and having them granted). "The defense ask that the prosecution cease referring to our client as "The Ripper" as we fear it may inappropriately sway the jury's decision"
  • Alcohol as Imagination Juice
  • Fake Theatresports
  • Gandalf in a Wedding Shop (main joke he is changing from grey to white?)
  • Building a factory to avoid the sex talk with your kid
  • A Character or a sketch entirely in third person passive aggression
  • Human watching by birds
  • "Leave the nest" - Birds want their sex life back
  • A fairy princess walks into a bar...
  • Philosophical debate on "What is a hat?"
  • "Real Batman" goes to Supernova
  • "Yar" FM, pirate radio
  • Octopus Existential Crisis (Get off my lawn?)
  • Spongebob doesn't live in a pineapple anymore due to dangerous pointy bits being bad for kids
  • Worst time to be an optomist
  • An Abusive Muse
  • A Zoo of stereotypical people
  • A Zoo of inner city animals
  • Imaginary Art that critics love (maybe due to being high)
  • Bananas in Pyjamas - B2 dressed in the wrong pyjamas, they don't think the same thing anymore
  • Cactus as a Herbal Remedy (maybe an acupuncture device and Chiropractic back fixing device at the same time)
  • Physicists/Chemists solve the glass half full problem to piss off philosophers
  • The Pope undercover (his hat looks different)
  • Passive Aggressive Stephen Hawking (maybe video sketch)
  • Operatic Rap
  • Pavarotti singing "Trollololololol..."
  • A villain who treats his Henchmen like his children and the hero like his ex-wife
  • Time traveller demanding his stuff back from people who travelled forward in time to bring it back
  • Banning children's games for being too violent eg. Simon Says, Bull Rush, tag, hide and seek "it isn't even called that" (making fun of lack of 18+ game ratings in Australia)
  • Having to feed the top hat the rabbit after the show for a reward
  • Wedding where first dance is to ridiculous music (Screamo, Techno, Minimalist, U2 (jokes, jokes, we've got no problem with Minimalist))
  • A tough butcher who acts like a little girl/Skivy? Is that what they're called? Chavs?
  • Gap year students in a competition for who has been to the most obscure, amazing country (Thailand, then Thailaysia, Double Vietnam)
  • Kids duel to the death for a stuffed animal
  • If the Godfather's family business was a Zoo (puts a giraffe's head in the man's bed, people will sleep with the penguins, they murder people with bees, etc.)
  • Chemistry class with pheromones, lots of sexual tension when the canisters are open, none when they're closed
  • The wookie version of Pavarotti
  • Two girls wearing identical pyjamas at slumber party
  • The Clumsy Octopus (things stick to tentacles, trips over tentacles, can't let things go)
  • People applauding at innapropriate times, eg. at a car crash (wooo! that was awesome, how did they do that!) [probably some time less likely to touch a nerve with some people, as this could obviously bring up some stuff we don't want to remind them of]
  • A guy dressed as a paper clip/holding a paper clip acts like a smart arse around people (a la the Microsoft Word paperclip). "Hey Steve, how's it going?" "It looks like you're trying to have a conservation, do you need help with that?" "I remember why I don't hang out with you anymore, you dick" "It looks like you're trying to insult me..." etc.
  • A parody of the Sarlacc pit, called the Sar-chasm, where instead of 1000 years of pain and torture people thrown into it are subjected to biting wit, sarcasm and quips. Possibly a voice over.
  • Inside a Guinness World Records Board Meeting. (I have nothing to flesh this out with, but do your best Revuers!)
  • A medical emergency where there are a group of people with PhDs mistaken for medical doctors. Maybe four or so PhDs from very different fields, they don't have a clue how to help the person but they try to use knowledge from their fields and it all goes horribly wrong?
  • Lotr science parody. Fellowship of the...? Change "you have my sword, and my bow, and my axe" into something nerdy. Labcoats, safety glasses, pipettes etc.
  • Lucifer is just socially awkward and burning people is how he makes friends 

Running Gags
  • Improper use of expression or word.  For example, having someone say "we're gonna need a bigger boat", improperly.  Alternatively people saying "literally" in the wrong context.

Video Sketch Ideas
  • A commercial for Science Revue in the style of a Perfume ad. "Dorkus. By Science Revue."
  • Wife swap - perhaps video sketch (trailer) - Narcissa Malfoy & Molly Weasley swap
  • Australian Idol style video journey - Darth Vader. Showing important moments from his life including "Darth, you are not the father".
  • Someone breaks out of video sketch onto the stage/juliets.
  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - just horribly mutated turtles, living in sewer.
  • someone who has their own theme song, band follows them everywhere they go.
  • Tron dance video
  • invisible rollercoaster
  • flashmob where everyone starts vomiting
  • zombie movie trailer with a twist (from zombie's perspective)
  • michael richardson sitting in room alone playing with dinosaurs
  • Movie Trailer: Gamma Thrones - Nuclear Winter is Coming ---> in a lab, radiation stuff, everyone dies
  • usyd opens a magic school
  • send in the clowns mafia sketch (from last year)
  • serious news program/urgent news flash interrupted by a regular program i.e. playschool
  • Genres: infomercial, news/doco, movie trailer, vlog, MTV
Song Ideas:

  • Pavarotti singing tragedy about the friendzone
  • Quicker, smaller, smarter, TRONer (parody of Bigger, faster, smarter, stronger)
  • killers parady "somebody trolled me"
  • Guitar hero choir number. As the choir sings, a guitar hero type animation is played on the screen representing what the choir is singing, but with S A T B instead of guitar strings.
  • Let's Dance To Cell Division (The Wombats)
  • Something to do with 'Defying Gravity' - maybe Higgs Boson pun could be worked in? as in "and you can't pull me down...oh shit."
  • instead of 'California girls' - 'california boys' - about all the guys in silicon valley.